Muffin Tops are IN!!

Muffin Tops are In!

You’re thinking…really? I know, as a child of the 80’s, I had a smokin’ body with thanks from plenty of aerobics and sit-ups, well hidden under my two layered shirt, skirt with leggings, and three pairs of socks.  Fashion- maybe.  Lack of self confidence?  More than likely.

Now I look around at these girls, and they’re wearing minimal fabric on their bodies, and I’m not sure they know what a sit-up is.  That muffin top roll is prominently displayed for the world to see.  But what else do I notice about these girls with muffin tops of all sizes? I notice them walking with their chins up, and shoulders back as if they could care less that my mouth is wide open and I’m shocked at their appearance?  They have confidence, oodles of it, and what a beautiful thing.

I think growing up, and growing older, self-confidence is something that has been hard for me to grasp hold of.  I can’t even begin to tell you anything I was confident about before I was twelve.  In junior high I was a good student.  Straight A’s with that one pesky B blocking my perfect GPA.  (But just for the record it was an 88%)  In high school, I was a good vocalist.  In fact, my professional voice coach told me I had a voice of a classily trained opera singer.  It usually took 20 years to accomplish that kind of voice and I was 10 years ahead of most people.  What I didn’t have was the confidence to carry though.

I never aced an audition, because I didn’t have the confidence to do it my way.  I’d take the easy route.  I didn’t have the confidence to try things in college or get more involved, because I just might fail if I got that far.

I never submitted my manuscript because someone might just turn it down.

KaBoom!  Hit with the grenade of truth! 

If you don’t have confidence in yourself, well you’re hiding your muffin top.  How can you be a successful writer if you won’t let someone read your work?  Guess what. I got shot down, over and over and over again.  It hurt.  When someone tells you, “This is so bad I wouldn’t even consider it if came across my desk,” you tend to shed a few tears.  Or, “If I buy you a box of commas will you use them?” (This is classic.  This was a contest and those two comments paired with someone who gave me no comments and a very high score. Helpful, huh?) This tends to make you hide your muffin top under layers and layers of rewrites. 

Then one day you decide you’re worthy of the tighter shirt.  You have nothing to hide.  You attend a local RWA meeting.  You get a critique partner, actually two and one happens to be a retired language arts teacher.  You learn that you use and a awful lot.  You begin to understand that you shift POV much too often.  When a critique partner says, “This isn’t making sense to me,” you realize that you haven’t looked at that story.  You hid it, because you didn’t want to show it to the world yet.  You have to revise.

Once you expose that muffin top, you don’t care who is looking.  You push your shoulders back and walk with your chin high.  Then you begin to feel the power.  That first person asks for a partial manuscript, which leads to a full.  You have Beta readers who come back and ask for more.  The book becomes reality and people come to you crying because what you wrote moved them so deeply and changed their lives.  You become someone asked to attend signings, be on committees, and the glorious part – you’re asked to write more books.

Suddenly you realize you’re showing off your muffin top in a bikini!  You’re totally exposed!  But your head is high, shoulders pushed back, and you’re feeling that self confidence like you never have before.

So I wonder, who will those girls who bare their muffin tops become?  Will they take over the world someday in their tight shirts?  Perhaps.  Until then, I’ll hide my literal muffin top under a peasant shirt, but keep my chin high, shoulders back, and I’ll keep writing because that’s what I love to do!

Happy Reading!
Bernadette Marie

The Warrior Princess

The Warrior Princess blog, huh?  What does that mean?

I'll admit that writing has always been a journey for myself.  I enjoy the creation and the nurturing of the story and the characters.  I've written almost twenty books since I was thirteen and am proud of each of them.  Each character is special to me.  However, it's not so much the writing for yourself as it is the sharing.  In 2009 I began to let others read my stories.  My first book MATCHMAKERS (Snowy Creek Romance release 4/2010) was the first book I let out into the world and into the hands of people I didn't know completely.  That said, my sister wasn't the only person reading me.  The response was overwhelming.  Even more amazing was what my readers were taking with them from the story.

Within my romance is another kind of love story.  The kind where the lost soul of a teenager and the lost soul of our heroine have a moment of bonding.  Where they find they do have something more in common than just the man the woman loves and the father the teenager isn't willing to let go of.  Each of them have physical scars that they hide from the world.  (Emotional ones too, but the turning point focuses on the physical scars.)  Sophia hides her scars with clothing and scarves.  Carissa hides hers with bracelets and long sleeves.  (No scars are from self inflicted wounds.)  But at a pivotal moment in the story each woman embraces their scars and the journey which gave them those scars.  They bond over this one likeness and find there are so many likenesses.  The women claim themselves warriors, as warriors have scars from battles they have fought and survived.

When my readers read this the emails and phone calls poured in.  Each of us had scars.  Physical or emotional, there was something in each woman who read about Sophia and Carissa.  Because the duo were shopping for party favors at the time, in the book, and had just been trying on tiaras, the term Warrior Princess emerged.

My readers and I have embraced this term for the past two years and made it our calling.  Every woman has a story of survival.  Whether it be battling cancer or a fear.  Maybe they had healing to do from a bad relationship or a car accident, like Sophia.  Some simply survived the teenage years of self torment to become adults.  Whatever journey each woman took they made that journey as a warrior.  Likewise, every woman is a princess and deserves some royal treatment.

I encourage you to share your Warrior Princess story with us by leaving us a post.  Feel free to use the Warrior Princess symbol on your sites or emails as well.  I've added it to this posting.  Together we are a team.  A team of Warrior Princesses making a difference in the lives of others and in our own.

And that is why my writing blog is called Warrior Princess.  Even romance novels can bring people together.

Happy Reading!
Bernadette Marie